Thursday, April 17, 2008

no longer hiding

debt is a cloak i don't want to wear.its suffocating, gives me the chills, and makes me feel like i'm living under a microscope. i hate it. why do i make the choices i do, when sometimes, wait, when always i know there's an alternative-just saying no. its frustrating, there's times when i want to just blow money, and i do. then reality sinks in when i see the balance of our bank account. i'm working on not beating myself up, but it really is a challenge when hubby asks me where money goes and i say, like every other time, bills, expenses, the stuff both you and i want but do we really need at that moment.
i've reflected on why i'm writing this, and its because i want to be the best i can be. live life to the fullest, and not hide behind a wall. i want to live the truth, be a whole person, and like what i see in the mirror. its something i'm working on, one dollar, one minute at a time. that's all i can handle right now. as long as i'm moving forward, that's what really counts.

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