Countdown

The countdown is on. 32 days to go, three birthdays in a five day period (maybe 4 if this baby decides to come early) and one big holiday-Thanksgiving! I had been wavering on what to do for the birthdays, the holidays, getting things lined up. What seems to have worked well so far is keeping up with what's going on in the day to day, and in these rare three, five, seven minute moments when I'm waiting for dinner to finish, or waiting to pick up the kids, I use that time to jot down ideas in my own little book, my little Fly Lady style notepad. Just thinking about it, getting it down and out, relieves the stress of everything building up at once. While I am somewhat anxious about when this baby will decide to come (middle of the night with everyone home vs conveniently when all the boys are at school/preschool) I really can't control that-so I have to let it go. I'll focus on enjoying the boys, enjoying my time w/ Robert, enjoying what time I have for myself, enjoy feeling this baby move and wriggle and wonder if its a boy or a girl, and how much hair will be on their head. Of course, names are also on my mind. I've been reluctant to share them-because its just one of those things besides announcing a pregnancy, a birth, that mom and dad get to share for the first time. Since I've slacked on posting since being pregnant, I don't think a lot of people read this anymore-so I'll post them here, and I'm sure it'll be new and exciting news to those who don't see it ahead of time. If we have a boy, I'm considering the name Samuel-after my great grandfather or Jonah. If we have a girl, this is where its hard-because we already have three boys (and I seriously doubt we'll have a girl, I have more of a variety-Rachael, Rebecca, Hannah, Miriam, and Lilian (after my great great grandmother-Dorothy and Regina are my grandmother's names, but those don't have the biblical/Hebrew tie in I preferred to keep like I did with the older boys). For all I know, I will have this baby and change my mind again, like I did with each of the boys. Time will tell.

This month went by quickly, and yesterday noted not only the celebration of Halloween, but the one year mark of when I first noticed we had a hot water leak under the slab of our home. It doesn't feel so significant to Robert-maybe because I was the one dealing with all the phone calls, the insurance agencies, the money issues. He was in the background, working to provide for us, but I feel like I carried the brunt of this headache-and tried to keep some sense of normalcy for the boys. It was definitely a struggle, put us in a money pit, but we overcame those challenges. I learned a lot about myself and how to deal with crisis', money struggles, and had some grown-up moments I had not yet experienced since I had lived on my own. I had preconceived notions of how our home would change once we had replaced the carpet/painted the walls, and I've found that its more my attitude change has made more of an impact-not having something shiny and brand new. I can only hope that with the steps I've taken I'll continue to move forward, enjoy my boys, enjoy this baby, be there for others, and enjoy my life.