I've been dragging my feet on cleaning out the baby items we have in the boys room. Its been sitting there, in bins, and boxes, neatly labeled, wondering where or when it would find a home. I have been on the fence about having a fourth, and while the thought is appealing, I know another baby would not need all that we have put away. Yet the neatly stacked pile of bins stood.
On another note yesterday a purebred lab approached the boys while we were outside playing. Soft and sweet, she must have been at least a couple of years old. G and E who normally shy away from dogs, were in love. M gently stroked her, and asked if we could keep her. My heart bellowed, knowing that I wanted this dog too. She didn't have a collar, and we thought it would be a good idea to take her to the SPCA to see if she was microchipped. Ugh. That was not the thing to do. Because we filed a "found" file, they require her to stay and be checked out. She's held there until Sunday, hoping that her owners come forward. We have to wait a week because she's a purebred, otherwise the wait would have been less. We're listed as the intended recipients though, so when we go on Sunday morning to the SPCA, we'll have first dibs on adopting her. The boys have already named her, and R and I think she was already an inside dog, so we'll have her inside. Its hard to believe how things happen, but I really feel that while we weren't intending to have another dog, we are open to bringing this one into our home, and call her ours. In the end though, I do hope this dog is adopted, whether by us or someone else.
Back to the baby items. A woman, one who I've met before, sent out a message on a local messageboard about needing clothes for her daughter in law who just had a baby after not being able to have one for four years. She was requesting a baby bath and the shells for the playtex bottles; something clicked for me-I asked her if they needed anything else. She told me everything they had had for babies was sold the weekend before they found out her daughter in law was expecting, and while the family had all the big items, things like spare blankets, cribsheets, and infant toys had gone to the wayside. They had just a few to get by, but nothing like it was when they had their first. I plowed through those boxes, and blessed another mother with items that would make taking care of her new baby just a little bit easier.
Another email came, from another woman. This time she needed a coat for her three year old daughter. I had seen her post before, but didn't get a reply. She had reposted her request after two other failed responses. Not only did I bring her one of Gabriel's (gender nuetral) heavy coats, but a big bag of toddler and preschooler girls clothes that were in great shape; I had received them from Freecycle, and did not have someone to pass them onto.
I love doing things like this to help others. It helps ground me when I have my low moments, and go through the "what-ifs" in my life. I have come to the conclusion I can only move forward, be there for myself and my kids and husband, and be there for those who want us in our lives.