Thursday, February 19, 2009

Reality check

Some days are much harder than others, and then there's days like today. Needless to day, it's 11:13 p.m. now, and yes, I am cracking open a glass of wine.

I thought I could deal with a sweatpant day. Nope. I tried on jeans at various stores. Nope. Leaving it to going online and finding a free shipping code sounds much more appealing.
Had a look at the credit card bills. Pleased that there are no new additions to the bills. Sucks to still look at the balances. Leaving to watch Dave Ramsey's Plasty Award Show, much more appealing, I know we're making headway.

Beaten down about not working in the field of my dreams-then wondering, what really do I want to do? Deciding that it really doesn't matter when I hear M talk about all the fun he had at the firehouse on a fieldtrip w/ his friends. Feeling content when E snuggles into me so much closer-before he doesn't anymore.

Reading about other's conflicted situations about job/living arrangements, and thinking wow-I can't relate to that-I'm responsible for little people, can't just think soley about myself (not that I haven't thought about my needs, but not like it was pre-marriage/kids). Then as I make my second ham casserole, realize, wow, I can cook and make something out of nothing. Couldn't do that 5 years ago, it would have stayed in the freezer for all eternity or gotten thrown out after spoiling in the fridge.

Hearing about my brother's sucky girlfriend who's happy w/ 11 hours a week at a minimum wage job (please, oh please, don't wind up pregnant), and him griping about money (who boasts about working two jobs, yet didn't lend a dime to help our father retain legal counsel). I'm done w/ siblings who whine about petty stuff. Leave it to my sister to call and discuss her and her boyfriend's trip down here in another month or so, to put me in better spirits. I'm sure we'll find a free way of enjoying our company.

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